Dumbest Rumor I’ve Ever Heard – The Return of the Newton

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You know, sometimes you read a rumor that is just so blisteringly stupid, that you just can’t help but talk about it. That’s the case with the latest intel coming from Apple Insider.

They have “sources” (not the quotation marks) that have the inside track on what’s next for Apple – a new version of the Newton.

That’s right – Apple is going to ride the train of success all the way back down by scraping the bottom of the barrel, and reviving one of their biggest failures to compete in a market no one cares about.

It makes perfect sense…except, of course, that it’s completely ridiculous.

The return of the Newton is a rumor that just won’t die, and Apple Insider seems fit to make sure that this idiocy lives on forever. There is no end to the ways you can begin to explain why this isn’t happening and has never been happening.

First off, there is no Ultra Portable computer market. It’s not there – and if it was there – or Apple decided to create it — it would be a new Mac – not bringing back the brand name Newton. Also, based on the AI description, the device would only be roughtly twice the size of the iPhone – making it expensive, inconvenient, and basically useless.

It’s a device no one wants or needs (I know a few of you are going to scream “I want one” – but there aren’t enough of you to justify this product’s existance). Something that was twice as big as an iPhone would be just unportable enough to be a pain, and just small enough to not be a full blown computer.

The article even goes on to speculate that Apple is purposely holding the iPhone back to make this new device seem even cooler – with awesome features like Copy and Paste…that Apple apparently thinks we’ll believe is only capable on a device that’s larger than our iPhones…I just…I just can’t do this.

This is just so unbelievably ridiculous.

Here’s the main reason that you’ll never see this:

All of you with iPhones grab them and hold them in your hands. Do you know why Apple isn’t developing a Newton 2.0? Because you’re holding it in your hand right now. The iPhone IS a Newton 2.0.

Boom.

Done.

Comments

  1. Did you ever watch Newton’s Apple on PBS? That was a great show!

  2. How long do you suppose the PC as we know it (huge monitor, HDs, cables, keyboard) is going to last? It has to evolve.

    I don’t think this is out of the question. If Apple can sell a product and make a great margin at it, why not? Multi-touch is the future and Apple would be stupid not to get a hybrid iPod touch/Mac device out there. Then they can basically lockout the competition before they are even able to come to the market with a knock-off. The tablet market is dead because there are no great products out there. If Apple were build a $799 “MacTouch” with 16/32 GB flash memory, iTunes, wifi, iWork suite, iPhoto and iChat camera, look out. Imagine real, portable iChat!

    I say continue the Mac brand and the multi-touch technology so they can create a new market and own it now.

  3. Perfect argument. Why would there be another PDA when there is the iPhone ?
    Now, if only then can add handwriting recognition to the iPhone …

  4. I don’t know a single professional person who has used a PDA since the Blackberry hit the market. I have no doubt that Apple is continuing R&D into all sorts of exploratory areas, but anyone who thinks Apple is going pour millions into a dead market to for a device they’ve already made needs to step away from the screen and re-enter the real world for a few days.

  5. [Something that was twice as big as an iPhone would be just unportable enough to be a pain, and just small enough to not be a full blown computer.]

    Exactly.

    BTW, most people can type with two fingers much faster than they can write with one hand. Even one finger typing, on say a Blackberry is faster. HwR is fairly useless. Even when is works it’s slower. However, speech recognition is faster than both.

  6. Steve Grenier says:

    I gotta agree with you Mike, the iPhone is the long rumored return of the Newton, I doubt Apple would create another, UNLESS it was more of a macbook with a multitouch interface. But as far as handhelds go I think the iPhone is going to be their pda.

  7. The Wizard says:

    I can’t agree with you more Michael. This is completely ridiculous, the Newton re-incarnation thing. Although I am really dying for an ultra-portable ultra-thin mac (10 – 12)”. That would be my dream machine.

    I am currently unsing a 12” Acer and I love the form factor and portability (really light) of this take every-where use any-how machine.

    I hope I can use OS X with the same ease and convenience. And dear Michael if you think that your 15” MBP or even a 13” MB sans pro can get you any where near that super cool portable experience. Please, think again :-)

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